Some people don’t realize they have Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) because their symptoms aren’t as clear. Unlike regular BPD, which is known for emotional outbursts and impulsive actions, quiet BPD tends to show more subtle signs. People with quiet BPD frequently struggle in silence, which makes it difficult for others to grasp their emotional distress.
To know more about what is Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder, you need to look at the main symptoms, how it’s different from regular BPD, and how to cope with and manage it.
A Quick Look at Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder
Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder is a less obvious manifestation of BPD. Unlike those with more outward expressions of BPD, individuals with quiet BPD tend to internalize their emotions. They might seem calm and cool on the surface, but on the inside, they suffer from great emotional suffering, fear of abandonment, and feelings of emptiness.
The emotional distress from silent BPD can be overwhelming. People often misunderstand those with quiet BPD because they don’t express their feelings in the same way as others with BPD. They are more likely to suffer quietly and withdraw from others instead of showing anger or seeking attention.
Symptoms of Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder
Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) differs from other forms of BPD in a few significant ways. Here are some common quiet BPD symptoms:
Internalized Emotions
People with quiet BPD keep their feelings inside, unlike those with traditional BPD who express their emotions outwardly. They may feel angry, sad, or anxious but won’t show it. They bottle up these emotions, which can lead to stress, anxiety, or even self-harm.
Fear of Abandonment
Like regular BPD, fear of abandonment is common in quiet BPD. However, individuals with quiet BPD may distance themselves from others to prevent harm. They may expect others to abandon them, even if it’s not true.
Feelings of Emptiness
People with quiet BPD frequently feel empty or purposeless. They frequently conceal this overwhelming feeling. It might cause grief and bewilderment, making it difficult for them to communicate with others.
Low Self-Esteem and Self-Doubt
A common symptom of quiet BPD is low self-worth. People with quiet BPD may believe they are unworthy of love or attention. They might criticize themselves and refrain from expressing their genuine emotions, believing their flaws prevent them from understanding or acceptance.
Emotional Intensity Behind the Calm Exterior
Even though someone with quiet BPD might seem calm on the outside, their emotions can be intense and overwhelming. They may experience mood swings or deep emotional pain that they hide from others.
Difficulty Expressing Needs
People with quiet BPD often find it challenging to ask for help or express what they need. They may suffer in silence instead of sharing their frustrations or desires, fearing being a burden or rejection.
Quiet BPD Meltdown
In quiet BPD, a “meltdown” usually looks different than in traditional BPD. Instead of outward outbursts, people may shut down emotionally or withdraw. They experience deep distress, but it’s not obvious to those around them.
Idealization and Devaluation (Inwardly)
Quiet BPD often involves idealizing or devaluing others, but this happens inside, rather than being shown outwardly. A person with quiet BPD may put someone on a pedestal, only to later feel disappointed or hurt by them, all while keeping these feelings to themselves.
How Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder Differs from Other Forms of BPD
The main difference between quiet borderline personality disorder (BPD) and traditional BPD lies in how emotions are expressed. Typical BPD often manifests emotions through outward behaviors such as outbursts, impulsive actions, or attention-seeking behavior. On the other hand, people with silent BPD tend to keep their feelings inside, internalizing their distress rather than expressing it outwardly.
These internalizations can make quiet BPD harder to detect, making it harder for sufferers to get help. Invisible emotional struggles may make others unaware of their pain and how to help.
Diagnosing Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder
The process for diagnosing quiet borderline personality disorder (BPD) is similar to that of traditional BPD, following the guidelines set in the DSM-5. A mental health professional will determine if the individual meets at least five of the nine criteria linked to BPD. These include:
- Fear of abandonment
- Unstable relationships
- Unstable self-image
- Impulsive behaviors
- Recurrent suicidal thoughts or self-harm
- Intense mood swings
- Persistent feelings of emptiness
- Inappropriate anger
- Dissociative symptoms
For a correct diagnosis, clinicians need to differentiate quiet BPD from other conditions such as depression or anxiety, as many symptoms can be similar. This guarantees the individual receives appropriate therapy and care.
Treatment Options for Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder
Treating quiet borderline personality disorder typically includes a mix of therapy and medications to manage symptoms:
Psychotherapy
- Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) is specifically developed for persons with BPD, teaching them how to manage their emotions, enhance their relationships, deal with stress, and stay in the present moment.
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) teaches people how to identify problematic thinking patterns and create healthier coping methods.
- Schema Therapy aims to change deeply ingrained patterns that contribute to emotional distress and relational problems.
Medication
Although there are no medications specifically approved for BPD, certain drugs can help with symptoms like anxiety or depression:
- Antidepressants
- Mood stabilizers
- Antipsychotics
Coping Strategies for Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder
Managing quiet borderline personality disorder can be challenging, but several strategies can help individuals handle their emotions and improve their overall well-being.
Therapy
Particularly dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), is beneficial in treating silent BPD. DBT teaches people how to regulate their emotions, improve their relationships, and deal with discomfort in better ways.
Mindfulness
Mindfulness strategies such as meditation and deep breathing can assist people with quiet BPD deal with overwhelming emotions. Focusing on the present moment allows people to lower emotional intensity and break free from harmful thought patterns.
Building Strong Relationships
Though it may be difficult to open up, building a supportive network is vital for people with quiet BPD. A strong support system encourages sharing feelings more openly, reducing emotional isolation.
Journaling
Writing down ideas and emotions can be an effective way to communicate sentiments. Journaling provides clarity and serves as an emotional outlet for feelings that might otherwise remain hidden.
Self-Compassion
Practicing self-compassion is crucial in managing quiet BPD. Being gentle with oneself helps counter negative self-talk and fosters a more positive self-image over time.
Emotional Awareness
Developing emotional awareness allows individuals with quiet BPD to recognize their feelings and respond more effectively. By acknowledging emotions when they arise, it becomes easier to express them in healthy ways rather than suppressing them.
Understanding the Hidden Struggles of Quiet BPD
Internalized symptoms of Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder often go unnoticed, leading to emotional pain and isolation. It’s important to recognize that even if someone isn’t showing outward signs, they can still be experiencing intense struggles. By being more understanding and supportive, you can help those with quiet BPD feel less alone and encourage them to seek help. Recognizing their pain is key to offering the right support and breaking the cycle of silence.